Tattoo’s & Oxymorons

 Years back when I went to get this tattoo I was in a fairly rough spot. Heartbroken, lost, having a hard time moving forward- and without much drive to do so. I had been working on this design for a while, trying to work out something that encompassed an assortment of my core beliefs, things that would stand the test of time and not leave. Permanence in an impermanent world. 

If you don’t know, now you know (subjectively speaking): 

• The three spokes represents that what you put out there comes back three-fold. Positive energy, negative energy, love, hate. You reap what you sow. 
• Circle in the middle is to be mindful of trying to stay centered- as was the chosen location of it on my body
• The wave like ends of the three spokes represents the ebb and flow, up and down, tides of life
• The Celtic knots surrounding it are a nod to my Irish/Celtic roots, as well as my earth based “religious” beliefs, with the ways they interlock representing everything & everyone being connected 
• Green is to represent nature

When I finally pulled the trigger to get these things etched on my body, man, did it hurt (I am in constant awe of people who can handle getting multiple tattoos, especially in certain areas. Maybe my body is just more sensitive or something?). There’s no such thing as circumnavigating the psychical pain that is tattoos, just as there’s no foolproof plan for circumnavigating emotions- despite the fact that humans have devised a multitude of deferment methods for the latter, to which I am no stranger to having indulged. 

Tangents aside- for the first time since getting this first tattoo I’m open to another, but with different meaning & motivations. And perhaps somewhere less painful where I can actually see it. I should note, I wrote this all while re-watching Eat, Pray, Love. I had also forgotten how much I love this movie. And need to travel. 

Recommendations for less painful spots on the body? 

To The Ultimate "Queenie"

The last time I saw my Grandma, I had gone up to Bend, Oregon to be with some family after my sweet Grandpa had just passed away. On the last morning there, as my cousin and I were saying our goodbyes and preparing to hit the road home, I couldn’t quite bring myself to leave. Standing in the living room near the door to the outside, I looked across the room to my Grandma, feeling this sad heaviness that somehow, I might not see her again. Looking over she caught me gazing at her, and said in my very Grandma-like way, “oh stop, you’ll see me again. Now go!” I regret never making it to Montana to be able to see her again.

Kathryn Jeanette Whittier was born on November 13^th, 1921 in Santa Monica, CA. The year that Albert Einstein was awarded the Nobel Prize in Physics, Amelia Earhart took her 1^st flying lesson, Adolf Hitler was named the leader of the Nazi party, Ernest Hemingway married Hadley Richardson and Insulin was discovered. On this day, when Santa Monica had a population of just over 15,000 people, and there were still hills of beautiful, undeveloped land all around Santa Monica, my Grandma with her fiery spirit and a force of nature in her own right, was born.

Lots of families have their own hierarchy system at work, and mine was no different in this way. Except, instead of a whole system, it all began and ended with my Grandma. She was the one and only matriarch- and it wasn’t without tough love, mixed in with a little fear and awe of her in my mind. Some of her favorite sayings were “be still,” in her authoritative tone. Or “children should be seen and not heard.” She was of a different generation in regard to respect to elders, and children’s places in the order of things. As a kid, I was scared to death of her at times. Actually, even as I got older. Haha. But damn, did I respect her!

On the flip side, she was also full of so much spunk & humor, one of the funniest/wittiest people I’ve ever known. She was a lover of animals and an advocate for underdogs/downtrodden of life, as well as an amazingly talented artist with a natural proclivity to creativity. She even somehow made the decorating of the Christmas tree every year seem like an art showing of sorts!

Growing up, she moved around a lot- having gone to 16 different high schools before graduating from San Diego High School. This was in most part to the fact that her Dad, my Great-Grandpa, was a Circus performer- so they traveled around a lot for that.  He, with his natural knack and connection to animals, performed with them, as well as shows on his roller skates. Her Mom, Kate, as far as the stories I’m told, was the toughest of ladies. She also had a sister, Mary Jane, who she loved beyond belief, who passed away in the 1980’s. This was something I don’t think my Grandma ever got over.

After my Grandma graduated high school, she went to work for the Ryan Aeronautical Co., which made important contributions to the nation’s war efforts through the building of warplanes used during World War II, through the Korean War and into the Cold War. Here, she wrote the society column in the company paper. Later, she enlisted in the WAAC’s (Women’s Army Auxiliary Corps), which was established in 1941 as a division of the United States Army for women to help with the war efforts.

Grandma on the army base

Grandma '46

A few years after this in 1947 at Lake Arrowhead, my Grandma met the love of her life, my Grandpa, William Peckham. After a courtship of 6 weeks, they married in August of that same year. Three kids, 5 grandkids and 2 great-grandkids later, I will never forget the way my Grandpa used to look at my Grandma. In my family, you never argued or talked back to my Grandma, because Grandpa was right there in the wings to defend, if my Grandma hadn’t already put you in line first. He was as in just as much awe of her as the rest of us - mixed with unwavering love. When my Grandpa passed, it was just short of their 67^th wedding anniversary.

Life in our family will never be the same without the unity that my Grandma & Grandpa brought to all of us, in the form of family gatherings and Thanksgivings and Christmas’s, family trips, etc. Such is the sad part of life when those who bring everyone together, pass on. I am appreciative for those years and memories in their homes, with the whole family, the smell of my Grandma’s cooking, her famous tacos, her silly and strong-willed nature, and the dynamic of all of us gathered together. As my Grandma would say when telling me tales of rough times in life, or if I was venting- “oh hey kid, that’s life.” With the tone of someone who’s been privy to the highs and low’s life can bring and the wisdom of age, that everything will be okay. And then, on December 7^th, 2016 at 95 years old, my Grandma after her long and colorful life, passed away. You were one of my favorite people, Grandma, and I will miss you. 

Chase & Grandma at Ridge Racquet Club 

Christmas at G & G's

Thanksgiving '84

4 Generations!

G & G 50's

'46

Yes, You Did!

Yes, we can. Hope. A feeling of the pendulum swinging towards a more just, fair, less scary world than what you inherited from Bush. A few of the feelings I remember oh so well back in 2008 when you got elected as the 44^th President of The United States, even before that- as I was vehemently defending you as the obvious choice for President when you were running, much to the chagrin of many friends/family. Because, you know, you weren’t saying stuff like- I can see Russia from my house. From the first time I heard you speak, I knew you were a man of eloquence and intelligence. When I was fortunate enough to go to your inauguration in Washington D.C upon your being voted in as President of The United States in 2008, it still stands as one of the best things I have experienced. 4 million people, not a single bad incident, and just an intense energy of hope & happiness filled the air. It is almost indescribable. As is the pain in my toes that day from how cold it was and not having the proper amount of layering of socks on, haha.

I wanted to take the opportunity to, actually more like felt like I needed to take this opportunity to, on the eve of this crazy election night of Clinton vs. Trump (it’s hard to even type it without cringing on the latter), to say thank you. Despite the disgusting obstructionism you faced from the beginning from men who would of rather seen you fail than America succeed (here’s a couple quotes of interest pertaining to the Republican party’s plan when Obama first got elected- “we’re going to do everything, and I mean everything we can do- to kill it, stop it, slow it down, whatever we can”- John Boehner, “the single most important thing we want to achieve is for President Obama to be a one-term President”- Mitch McConnell). I often wonder how much more you could of gotten done without facing this kind of inner-workings resistance. But despite this, among other obstacles such as the birther movement, racism, a divided government, you still carried yourself, as did your family, with nothing but grace & dignity. And you got a lot of amazing things done for this country.

I am so proud of the President you have been to this country the last 8 years, and I want to say thank you for a few things mentioned below:

Thank you for evolving on same-sex marriage. Once you did, your support was deafening and led to the legalization in all 50 states. I particularly loved your quote that said “love won.” It is of my opinion that only those with a certain level of intelligence are open to constant learning and evolving on things. 

Thank you for passing the Health Care Reform Act. It’s not perfect, but without it my Wife and I both couldn’t have had health care due to having had melanoma.

Thank you for reversing the Bush torture policies. They were disgusting, and not what America stands for. Relating to this, thank you for improving our image abroad as well. I remember traveling when Bush was President and being embarrassed to say I was from the U.S. at the time. Thanks for putting my personal pride back into being an American and what that stands for.

Thank you for being the first and only President to brew homemade craft beer in the White House.

Thank you for expanding the Wilderness and Watershed Protections, covering 2 million more acres of wilderness and 1,000’s of miles of rivers.

Thank you for repealing don’t ask, don’t tell.

Thank you for investing heavily in renewable technologies, more than any previous legislation. $90 billion to go towards the future of our planet and civilization. I’m gonna go ahead and say thank you from future generations too.

Thank you for expanding hate crimes protection- now including crimes based on one’s sexual orientation, gender or disability.

Thank you for adding 13.7 million new jobs over a 69-month streak of job growth.

Thank you for making it so if I travel to Cuba I can bring home as many cigars and bottles of rum as I want.

Thank you for ending use of private prisons.

Thank you for speaking out against conversion therapy. Quoted as saying “tonight, somewhere in America, a young person will struggle to fall to sleep, wrestling alone with a secret he’s held as long as he can remember. Soon, perhaps, he will decide it’s time to let that secret out. What happens next depends on him, his family, as well as his friends and his teachers and his community. But it also depends on us- the kind of society we engender, the kind of future we build.”

Thank you for expanding stem cell research.

Thank you for cracking down on bad for-profit colleges (looking at you Trumph University).

Thank you for passing credit card reform.

Thank you for recognizing the dangers of carbon dioxide, so now the EPA regulates its production.

Thank you, with Michelle, for improving school nutrition. The Healthy-Hunger Free Kids Act of 2010 mandated $4.5 billion to boost nutritional and health standards for kids school lunches.

Thank you for your humor and candor.

Thank you for being a complete and utter class act despite unprecedented obstructionism. There wasn’t a single scandal pertaining to you or the first family the entire time you were President. Thank you for being such great examples of a healthy, loving family unit to so many people. You handled your post as President of The United States the last 8 years with unmatched pragmatism, rationality, intelligence and, at proper times, the best humor- not to mention some amazing dance moves.

As you did at the last White House Correspondents Dinner, I’d say you deserve a ripple-effect mic drop that I gage will last the ages. I will miss you and your entire family. I am so proud to have voted for, supported and been alive during the time of your Presidency.

YES YOU DID! 

The cycle of life...in what seems like the blink of an eye...

Grandpa in the Sea Nymph '89

A number of weeks ago I lost my Grandpa. I'll be the first to admit, partly out of avoidance, partly out of the business of life, this is really the first time I've let my mind linger on it. With that being said, all my lingering mind can do now is think about the ways in which I miss him. See, I didn't have a huge male presence growing up, but my Grandpa was definitely my biggest male role model. This isn't meant to demean my Dad and what he meant to me- but frankly, he just wasn't really around having lived hours away, and he just wasn't the model of a man that my Grandpa was.

Grandpa '48

Grandma & Grandpa 50's

My Grandpa taught me the importance of integrity, and being patient, and kind, and loyal. There isn't a single day in my life that my Grandpa was alive that I didn't feel I had his unwavering love and support- and that's huge. I am so thankful to have had that person in my life, and also thankful for all the things he taught me about love, loyalty, family and integrity.

Grandpa & his girls 90's

When I think of him, it will always be an image in my mind of him smiling, or his voice laughing and saying "hey kiddo," in that way he would. His 5 o'clock on-the-dot G & T's he'd enjoy (always only one), and the way he used to look at my Grandma (they would of been married 67 years this month).

G & G on Mt.Baldy '88

Grandpa, Todd & Sonya 70's

Grandpa & I '85

Grandpa & Brent 

Thanks for the fishing trips, tennis & golf lessons, talks, hugs and love you always gave me Grandpa- I'll never forget you. 

Grandpa fishing Kern River '72

G & G New Years Eve '73

Grandpa in the 20's

And poof, just like that, gone. Sure makes things seem fleeting. 

Burma, You Are My Superstar

Little known, yet not very surprising fact about San Francisco is that it has far and away the most restaurants per capita, crushing every other major city in the nation. At more than 3,500 restaurants (in a 7 x 7 mile space), with foods represented from all corners of the globe that are bound to please the most adventurous of palates, Burma Superstar is one that reigns supreme.

Located not far from Golden Gate Park in the Inner Richmond district of San Francisco (as well as a second location in Oakland), Burma Superstar is what I refer to as a palace of tastiness. From the outside it doesn’t look like much, but once the doors open at 5 pm. for dinner service, by 5:30 it’s usually teeming with people outside who are on the waiting list to get in. This is due in large part to the power of amazing food meeting the power of word spreading, especially in a city that’s so adept in the culinary scene.   

Burma (now officially known as the Republic of the Union of Myanmar, or Myanmar for short), is a sovereign state in Southeast Asia bordered by China, Thailand, India, Laos and Bangladesh. Because of this, the style and flavors of their dishes have influences coming from all of these. Use of many different spices, herbs, nuts, mango and pickled tea leaves is commonplace. 

One of Burma Superstar’s most popular dishes is their tea leaf salad. It comes to your table as a beautiful arrangement of fried garlic, peanuts, sunflower seeds, roasted sesame, tomatoes, romaine dried shrimp and of course lahpet (pickled tea leaves), where it is then tossed by your server tableside with a fresh squeeze of half a lemon and a light dressing of fish sauce and peanut oil. The toasted nuts and the crispy fried garlic add to the crunchy textures it delivers, with a flavor profile of nutty-saltiness cut with citrus. It’s a mouthful of flavors while at the same time light, simple and refreshing. Did I mention its out-of-control good?

Tea Leaf Salad

The other dish I ate on my last visit to Burma Superstar was their Basil Chili Pork Belly. Pork belly is the boneless cut of fatty meat from the belly of a pig (where most bacon comes from as well), which basically equals yum. The texture/consistency of pork belly isn’t for everyone, where it has an incredibly tender/melt in your mouth-iness, like a “lobey piece of bacon”- but for me it’s glorious. They prepare their pork belly by wok-tossing it with roasted chili, bamboo shoots jalapenos & onions. Not only do the bamboo shoots and onions add a proper balance to the consistency, but the roasted chilis and jalapenos also give a beautiful kick to end each bite- as my English teacher in high school would say every essay should end with- a “ta-daw.” It burns so good. Throw in a thai iced tea or a singha thai beer to wash it all down and Burma Superstar will complete you. Did I mention it's also completely affordable to boot? 

Basil Chili Pork Belly

A room full of happy eaters

Palatable Writing

It’s always crazy to me just how fast time can go. One second your running around with your friends in the woods playing hide and seek, the next your graduating high school, the next you’re in your 30’s where conversations on children and mortgages becomes the norm. But with time and age also comes a deeper appreciation for the things, people and delicious delectables you get to experience and love.

It’s been 10 really-gone-fast years since I moved to San Francisco to finish college, which is what I consider the beginning of my food & libations renaissance. Growing up I wasn't exposed to a ton of food outside of my Mom’s comfort food. Not to say that it wasn't amazing in its own right, but it wasn't something that exposed me to the amazing world of all the different flavors, colors, textures, culture, history, etc. of food & drink that the San Francisco area has to offer. The Bay Area is an absolute food & libations mecca. Whether you’re craving Indian, Thai, late night cafés, sushi, Italian, wine bars, Burmese, French, martini bars, craft beer, etc. You get the drift.  

So here I am 10 years later with an insatiable appetite to learn, taste and write about the assortment of flavors & styles of cooking, distilling, harvesting, crafting and brewing that will come to hit my palate. With this in mind I bring you my blog, Delectable Dishing.

Pride! In The Name Of Love!

Go California!! 

The feelings I’m overcome with right now are not easy to explain- happiness, acceptance, love, proud…to name a few. The United States Supreme Court’s ruling this week has opened up a can of gay whoop-ass in California that just toppled the ideology that marriage is reserved for a man and woman- and instead brought it to being a civil right that should be blind to sex, and instead rooted in love and equality. If religion is your basis of argument against gay marriage, I say two words- straight atheists (being that they have been legally allowed to get married). If pro-creation is your other argument- I give you any number of men and/or woman who for whatever reason can’t have children. You scream sanctity- I say Tiger Woods. Let the madness end and fall back on what it is we all need and deserve at the end of the day, love and acceptance.

So many people of this movement have their own personal stories and hurdles, and mine are no more special than another’s. But regardless, all of our experiences are what shape and mold us into whom we become. How we choose to use our struggles is up to us.

Bree taking in the Pride Parade

For me, my personal struggle with coming to terms with my sexuality began at the young age of 16…I fell in love and had a “secret” relationship with my best friend for a couple years, unbeknownst to all of my closest friends and family- which in itself was a struggle. I remember walking the hallways in high school filled with all those good feelings you feel the first time you’re in love, but also in equal increments were these incredible feelings of guilt and confusion. It was not the easiest time. But, like so many others, I had been unconsciously spoon-fed the idea that it wasn't “normal,” it was a sin, etc. Despite the fact that it came/felt natural to me. It was an incredibly confusing time to feel like I was following a natural path for myself and happy, yet ashamed and scared at the same time for what it meant. It wasn't until a couple years later, around the age of 18, that I felt ready to “come clean” about my relationship with a few people. I was so scared- scared of not being accepted, scared of losing some of my friends, scared to be treated or looked at differently by people I cared so much about. Luckily for me, I had incredible people on my side that instead hugged me, accepted me, let me cry through it and for the most part are still in my life today. Not everyone is so lucky. But despite my amazing support system, there was still a part of me that they couldn't touch, which was still seeking validity and acceptance on a bigger scale. The Supreme Court’s ruling this week has touched on that chord that I didn't realize I had buried within me and healed it. All I can say is- Supreme Court, you complete me!

The man who expedited the cause- Mr. Gavin Newsom!

Around 10 years ago I met the woman who would come to be my lawfully wedded wife while working at Northridge in Nevada City. Breelyn is my best friend and the epitome of love, patience, understanding, compassion and amazingly hot all rolled into one- I am incredibly lucky. While Bree and I were one of the lucky couples who were able to tie the knot back in 2008 during the 5 month period it was legal- it still didn't feel right that we were legally married, yet other gay couples couldn't be. That in itself seemed oppressive. After the ruling on Wednesday I had a particular moment, which as time moves along I imagine will just become normalcy, where we were walking down the street holding hands and it somehow felt different. There was no more reason to feel self-aware of being judged, but instead was replaced with feelings of pride and acceptance within myself- with the law on our side now and thousands of people getting recognition along with us. Gotta say- it’s a really nice freeing, feeling.

Inside City Hall- Wedding Day Oct.22, 2008!

On our Wedding day- October 22nd, 2008!

As Macklemore so eloquently states-“strip away the fear, and it’s all the same- Love. About time we raised up!”  

Rainbow Wings!

MAY PROGRESS MARCH ON!!!